Coming To Terms

August 28, 2010 mommytobeaver
Tags: , ,

So, I’ve been a bit MIA lately. This is mostly due to the fact that I’ve been hiding out from my thoughts and feelings for the last week. Another month has gone by in which I did not get pregnant. This month I began charting my morning temp (BBT) and realized that the amount of time between ovulation and menstruation is not long enough. It needs to be 10 days minimum and mine was only 9 days.

Now I begin to ask myself, how much do I want this second child? Actually, that’s not even the right question. The real question should be, how much am I willing to do for a second child? This baby would be very wanted and loved, there’s no doubt about that. However, I am not too willing to be put on different medications, observed and tested. I definitely respect the women who decide to go this route, but I don’t have it in me. So, I came up with my own plan.

This month I am going to be charting my BBT again and will continue to do so until I get pregnant. I started taking 100mg of the vitamin B-6, which is supposed to aid in the production of progesterone. This afternoon I ordered some progesterone cream which I will use every day, twice per day, after ovulation until I’m either sure that month is a no go or until I’m 12 weeks pregnant. I’m also going to buy some ovulation predictor kits so I can pinpoint the correct day in my cycle. I’ve also started dieting in hopes that losing a bit of weight will help.

I need to be proactive about this my own way or it’s going to eat me up. I had really wanted Charla to be close in age to her little sibling. At this point, the closest they will be is 3 years. I have to come to terms with this. I need to set aside my ideal expectations. Life doesn’t always go the way one plans it to and it can be so hard to let those plans go. I think it’s okay to mourn the loss of the plans, but at the same time, it’s not healthy to dwell on them.


Entry Filed under: Operation pregnancy

One Comment Add your own

  • 1. angeci13  |  August 30, 2010 at 4:08 am

    Good point, it is good to mourn but not dwell on them. I need to remember that.

    Lots of baby dust to you :-)! Hopefully you won’t be trying long, and they’ll be 3 years apart.

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